While rewarding your children may be the last thing on your mind when you are having to tackle misbehavior, a good reward system can be one of the best ways to challenge and change their behavior. Reward systems usually work fast too.
They also work well for children of all ages. So, whether you have a toddler in the habit of pushing, or your teenager refuses to do their chores because ‘they forgot’, a simple and easy-to-follow reward system can help them to become responsible for their actions.
Let’s have a look at the different ages below:
Little Kids
Preschoolers and toddlers benefit from simple things like sticker charts. You could allow your children to decorate a piece of paper and then use then for the chart. This way they have been involved and engaged with the plan and therefore will be more invested in earning the stickers.
Choose stickers that they’ll love, you could even allow them to choose the stickers themselves. Just make sure you stand strong and don’t hand the stickers out until they have earned them.
Keep the chart on display. Toddlers and preschoolers are often proud of their accomplishments and want to make sure everyone else is aware they have earned stickers.
It works best if you choose one behavior to focus on at a time and make it simple.
Behaviors that work really well alongside a sticker chart include staying in their own bed at night and using the toilet. As soon as you see the desired behavior it is important for you to provide positive feedback for the good behavior as soon as you can.
School-Age Children
Stickers on their own aren’t normally enough to motivate school-age kids. They require more tangible rewards to stay motivated. They can also manage a more complex reward system. This means you are able to tackle bigger goals or possibly more than one behavior. You can use a sticker chart but also use praise and consider a small treat such as a Super Wings 4 pack or day out once they have reached a certain amount of stickers on their chart.
You don’t want to make the number of stickers too high though, your children may feel that it is unobtainable. Make sure they earn rewards regularly. Some school-age children may still need to have daily rewards, while others are able to wait several days to get an incentive. If you feel as though they aren’t getting along with having to build up the rewards, change the number of stickers they need to earn in order to get a reward.
Explain the reward system to your children, and make sure it is positive, rather than seen as a punishment.
Tweens
Tweens will normally benefit from more complicated systems with larger rewards. However, you need to remember, that not all rewards have to cost money. Having a later bedtime or longer screen time on the weekends can be huge motivators for children in this bracket.
You will find that some tweens feel too old for stickers, so a tally or token might work better. Enable them to save their tokens and have a shopping list of things they can exchange them for such as two tokens equal half an hour extra of their game or a later bedtime on a Friday night.
With tweens, you can deal with around three behaviors at a time. A great way to make them feel successful is to choose one behavior that you know they are already doing fairly well. This is often the key to keeping them motivated.
Teens
Teenagers will have outgrown any formal reward charts and systems. However, this does not mean you have to get rid of the systems altogether. Instead, work together to build a behavior management contract that links specific behaviors to different rewards.
For example, link your teenager’s ability to go to see a film with their friends to complete their homework on time all week.
Electronic devices are another privilege that works extremely well for teenagers. Think about giving them mobile phone privileges once their chores and homework have been finished. You need to ensure you are establishing clear rules so your children understand exactly where you are and what you expect from them.
This short guide should give you a good start when it comes to building an effective reward system for children of all ages. Do you have any other reward systems that work well? Please share your ideas in the comments below.
