Have you noticed money or credit cards missing from your purse? Maybe items from your home are mysteriously disappearing? Is your teenager the only one who’s had access to these items? If you’ve answered yes to all of these questions, your suspicions that your teen is stealing from you might be correct. Suspecting your teenager of stealing, whether from you or someone else, is a highly difficult situation to be in. But it’s a reality that many parents find themselves in. It can make you doubt your parenting abilities and whether you could have done anything different. You might become concerned about their future and the destructive path they might be currently following. It can also make you feel disappointed in your child and stop you from relaxing at home when they are there.
However, no matter how terrible you may be feeling this is an issue that cannot be overlooked. Stealing should be treated seriously, regardless of what it is that your teens have taken. So instead of pretending nothing has happened, use the advice in this guide and act now.
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Get some evidence
It can be easy to accuse your teen of stealing when you’re upset or angry. But acting on impulse is not the right tactic to use in this instance. You need to carry out a full investigation and get hard evidence that your teenager is, in fact, the culprit. Not only will this confirm your suspicions but it prevents them from denying your claims later on. Check your bank statements and receipts and triple check that you have not spend the money yourself. If your credit card has been taken, call the provider to discover where it was last used and how much was spent. Check the times of the transactions carefully and see if they occurred when your teen was at school or not. You should also ask your partner whether they have taken the money or your card. If nothing seems to add up, this could be the evidence you need.
As extreme as it might be, you may also need to install security cameras on the interior and exterior of your home. The Arlo Ultra is a popular model if you have no idea what you’re looking for, and it has the added benefit of being wireless so you can put it in the most subtle position you can find. Cameras can be particularly useful if larger items such as TVs and games consoles keep going missing. A security camera can give your undeniable proof of whether your teen is stealing or not. To find the best camera system for your home that’s within your budget, take a look at this from Security Camera King. Another option is to take note of any new possessions your teenager may have all of a sudden. If they don’t have a well-paid job, ask yourself where these new clothes or shoes are coming from. Once you have gathered enough evidence, only then should you confront your teen.
Pinpoint the cause
Once you feel you can prove that your teenager is stealing, you need to discuss it with them. This can be an upsetting conversation to have. But it could be a vital first step to changing their behavior for good. As difficult as it might be, show them your evidence and let them know about your concerns. Then, encourage them to open up and tell you why they have started stealing from you. Teens steal for a number of varying reasons. Some do it to fit in with a social group or to fund a drink or drug habit. Whereas other teens steal as a way of crying for help from their parents. They may be getting bullied or have a health issue they were too embarrassed to talk to you about. So listen to their reasoning and remain calm, no matter how upset you might be feeling. Your teen might lash out and get angry throughout your discussion, so prepare yourself for this beforehand too. Comfort them but don’t let them try to manipulate you either.
If your son or daughter finds it difficult to talk to your about their stealing, counseling is the next step. This can give them an environment to talk about why they steal as well a helping them accept the consequences of their actions. Many schools provide counseling services so contact your teen’s teachers to start the process.
Find a solution
Whatever the cause of your teens stealing might be, it’s vital that they are not allowed to keep what they have stolen. This sends out the wrong message and doesn’t punish your teen in the right way. Come up with numerous ways in which they can repay your for the items or money they have taken. Doing extras chores around the house could be an option as can finding them a part time job. It’s also important for you to reiterate just how bad stealing is and the effects it can have on their life. If your teen knows that stealing is a crime that could put them in prison, it could deter them from doing it again.
As well as making up for the theft of these items, this is also an opportunity to tackle the main cause. You might want to homeschool your teen or move them to another school to put a stop to their bullying. They could go to rehab sessions to deal with addiction before it becomes more severe. Your son or daughter could even start a new hobby which will allow them to meet new friends who won’t lead them astray. As helpless as they might feel, let them know that there is always a solution. Let them know that you are there for them and that dealing with these issues is for the best.
Allowing your teenager to steal without any punishment or consequences will not teach them anything. Their behavior and stealing habit may get even worse as a result. Let your teen know how upset you are with them and that this behavior will not be tolerated. But also be supportive and listen when they talk to you. Work together is the best way to ensure their need to steal gets quickly and firmly diminished.